i am trying to read a book about chronic pain, called the pain chronicles, but it is tedious work. the language is so dense & flowery & needlessly pretentious. there’s all this crap about deer falling through ice & pain as a metaphorical response to romantic love…i hope it gets better. i hope i can stay awake long enough to appreciate whatever nuggets of truth are lurking within the book.
so, last night, jared & i went to the thanks for nothing show, which is a night of cover bands, each one covering tunes by a different punk band. of least interest to us were the urinals & the melvins cover bands. more exciting were jawbreaker, minor threat, bikini kill, & nirvana. we almost bailed before the nirvana cover band because we were tired & they were last, but cait talked our ears off until they started & convinced us to stay. & i’m glad we did, because they were pretty fun. they mostly did songs off “bleach,” which was far more amusing than it sounds. i wasn’t 100% psyched about jawbreaker because i honestly never really listened to them much & their songs aren’t all that familiar to me, but i did enjoy the singer’s attempts to sustain the jawbreaker rasp. he did a very nice job. i also was not psyched about the minor threat cover band because i hate ian mackaye so much, i want nothing to do with anything he does. but they really won me over, for two reasons: 1) hilarious stage banter that mimicked all of ian’s most self-righteous opinions, & 2) jared went completely bananas for them. he actually tried to start a circle pit, which did not pan out, because apparently kids from missouri & kansas are notorious for being unable to sustain a circle pit. they just mosh. which actually just consists of shoving each other really hard.
needless to say, i was most curious about the bikini kill cover band, which so did not disappoint! they were genius. the singer even did the little dude-bro interview sequence before launching into the lyrics to “white boy”. i knew a fair number of people at the show (considering how few people i actually know in lawrence), & i have to say, it was really cool to see all these ladies i DON’T know being really into the bikini kill cover band & singing along to all the lyrics. i felt so much solidarity with all the ladies in the bar (except kelly, who later said that she skipped bikini kill to sit outside & smoke because she likes ladies, but she loves cigarettes) (okay, i’ll still be in solidarity with her). i can’t even begin to imagine how awesome it must have been to actually see bikini kill play back in the day. i have always been really into them, of course, & i thought their lyrics expressed by disaffected teenage feminist angst really well, but it must have been totally mind-blowing to be at an actual bikini kill show in like 1992. my mind was a little bit blown just watching a cover band last night! i just really loved watching all these different kinds of ladies yelling, “your whole fucking culture alienates me!”
when we came home, i spotted the world’s most humongous spider in the hallway. it was so big, i almost didn’t think it was a spider. i thought it was maybe a dark-colored grasshopper or something. & it was just standing there, doing nothing. so i was able to get pretty close to it, at which point i realized it was a spider, & i told jared, “there’s a huge horrible monster in the hallway.” he killed it. i seriously think it may have been an acromantula, a ginormous spider heretofore believed to be mythical. i have seen a lot of spiders in my day, but none as huge at that one. even jared, who consistently downplays the size of spiders he kills in an effort to mitigate my spider phobia, acknowledged that it was fucking huge. it practically required a burial.
so i know some people were curious about my babysitters club fan fiction, which i posted a few days ago. that was my first time writing fan fiction ever in my life. i actually had a lot of fun with it! by aging the characters i chose ten years, & choosing minor characters to begin with, i was able to impose a lot of personality of my own invention on them, but it was still fun to imagine how these characters i “know” might respond to the situation i created for them.
the story, i am somewhat embarrassed to admit, is part of a larger writing exercise i may pursue, which involves writing a hundred stories based off a hundred different prompts–all of them babysitters club-themed in one way or another. it could be fun, but i am torn. i don’t really understand the point of fan fic. someone want to help me out with this? i know my sister writes tons of it, & has even won awards & had her fan fiction translated into other languages. but…why? i think it can be fun if i think of it as a writing exercise as opposed to, like, the actual endpoint of my creative energy. but there’s also a chance that i am just looking down my nose at fan fiction because i fear (know) that it’s incredibly nerdy. i am not really a person who has a lot of non-ironic interests, so i have a hard time thinking of myself as a “fan” of anything. but i have read every babysitters club book ever written at least a couple of times–& in some cases, dozens of times. might as well put all this useless knowledge to some kind of purpose.